Dear No One,

This week is National Infertility Awareness Week. Although 1 in 8 couples experience infertility, it is still isolating. And you soon find it taking over your entire life.

You start planning around ovulation. Trying to be as healthy as possible (just in case!) you get pregnant. You fall into a depression and believe a baby is the only thing that can bring you joy. With IVF, our lives were quickly consumed with doctor appointments, shots, procedures, tests.

Before we even started IVF, Marcus requested a week off over our 5 year anniversary, which happens to be this week. We weren’t sure what we would do or where we would go, but we wanted a vacation away with just the two of us.

Well I had assumed we would do the transfer immediately after our egg retrieval in January, but my body had other plans. Our transfer was pushed back 6-8 weeks into March.

I struggled with being patient and having to wait. One day, I broke down to Marcus. How could we plan the trip in April? What if we were newly pregnant and I didn’t feel good? What if it didn’t work, and we were prepping for another transfer? How would I deal with shots while traveling? What if we were just too broken to enjoy a trip?

We decided, on that day, to stop letting infertility control every moment of our lives. Let’s just plan a trip! Let’s do it. No matter where we are or what we’re doing in the process of IVF, we decided we would need a break anyway.

Now that I’m sitting here next to the pool, in 90 degree weather, next to my stud muffin of a husband, I am so glad we did this. Yes, I don’t feel great. (Marcus is enjoying most of my meals that I order.) Yes, I have to do shots every evening. But I am so grateful to take a step away from our daily routine to simply be together and enjoy ourselves. And take in the beauty around us.

Infertility can consume you. There are reminders everywhere of the pain you carry. Whether you just need to find a support group or take a timeout from trying to conceive or need a whole vacation away from “real life,” do it. Remember the life you had before infertility. Take time to realize there is more to enjoy than just building your family. Take back your story.

With that said, never give up. Your family may not look exactly like what you planned. Every step will be hard. Infertility will change you. Let it. But don’t let it take your life away.

To all my infertility warriors, you are stronger than you think. I hope this week brings light to the darkness of infertility by showing us all that we are not alone.

All my love,

Betsy